Public Health Crisis. We’ve all probably heard the phrase and get a general idea – it’s a big deal issue that affects the health of lots of people at the same time. When discussing public health crises, you’ll often hear people talking about issues such as heart disease, obesity, & smoking. More recently, issues such as gun violence, racism, and climate change have become popular public health crisis discussion topics. So what would you consider to be the top public health crisis we’re currently facing? Would it be any of the issues I just mentioned? If your answer is “yes,” the author of the book The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, & Body in the Healing of Trauma, would disagree with you. So what does Bissel Van Der Kolk, M.D. think is the #1 public health crisis at the moment? Simple: he says it’s trauma. And, as an Adult Child of Alcoholics, I think he may be right! Keep reading to find out why.
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, & Body in the Healing of Trauma was first published in 2014. Bissel Van Der Kolk, M.D., is a psychiatrist and researcher who started treating traumatized individuals and became interested in trauma research back in the 1970s while working with Vietnam Veterans. This book is the culmination of his experiences alongside a detailed history of how trauma has been treated throughout the years. It also includes some really mind-boggling explanations of the most recent research on trauma and available treatment options. Inside the pages, you will find shocking statistics, charts, and images as well as painful personal stories. And, let me tell you, reading this book was fascinating and heartbreaking in equal measure. I had so many moments while reading this book where I felt furious, then amazed, then hopeful all while I was learning so much about the brain and body and how trauma deeply and drastically changes them both.
I can’t tell you the deep rage I felt in my body when I read the statistics on retraumatization for girls who grew up in dysfunction. When a young girl grows up in a dysfunctional situation, she can become accustomed to other people’s bad behavior, overriding her own intuition when she doesn’t feel safe, etc. The book says that basically the girl’s “smoke alarm” becomes “faulty” and she doesn’t always recognize danger the way she needs to in order to stay safe. This alone makes her approximately seven times more likely to be raped at least once in her lifetime!
And what’s one of the biggest predictors of experiencing domestic violence as an adult woman? Having witnessed domestic violence as a young girl. Reading this infuriates me. As a young person, I thought that moving away from my childhood home(s) and family of origin would be enough to stop the drama and violence in my life. I thought marrying a guy who wore polo shirts and khakis who didn’t party would be enough – because he was so different from the men I had grown up around. I thought not drinking, smoking, or doing any drugs myself would be enough. I thought being a committed, loving parent would be enough. I thought all of this would make me and my kids safe! But none of it was enough and we weren’t safe. I had already been infected! It didn’t matter how far I went. It didn’t matter that I tried to marry a “good guy.” My smoke alarm was faulty and I ended up in a domestic violence situation anyway. Just like my mom and her mom before her and so on and so forth. I had a predisposition toward it and I didn’t even know it. I walked right into the trap proud of myself for “escaping” without knowing what was coming. And that hurts and terrifies me. Young girls deserve better. I did too.
This feels slightly personal but I’m going to tell you anyway because I think it’ll help you understand what I’m talking about here, okay? Here it goes: I had a complete brain melt when I read about “The Three Levels of Safety” that we all use to respond to any type of threat. Tell me if this hits for you too. The author explains that, when you face a threat, your first response is Social Engagement. You will probably want to connect with another person, lean on a loved one, or talk it out with someone you trust. Now, if you don’t have time for that because of the type of threat it is or if you don’t have someone to do that with, you move on to the second level which is fight or flight. This is where you puff up, yell, argue, or take off. But if there is no way out…if you’re an adult in a domestic violence situation or a little kid at home with an abusive alcoholic parent and you are really stuck, you go into the third level of safety which is the dorsal vagal shutdown. And those big words just mean this: your body shuts down. Your body shuts way down. This can look and feel like a lot of different things such as:
- All of a sudden, you’re beyond exhausted and have to lay down
- You feel like you can’t breathe or move, maybe you just sit there staring at a wall
- Your heart rate is plunging down
- Maybe you feel dizzy or like the flu is coming on
- Your stomach aches, maybe you can’t eat
- Clear thinking isn’t possible. Your brain is in a haze.
- You can’t say the right words, you’re stumbling over words, or can’t say any words at all
I have to tell you. When I read about Dorsal Vagal Shutdown, I cried. Because I felt the recognition of this experience in my bones. My body shuttered. I knew immediately that this is what has been happening to me in stressful situations where I can’t get away. Dorsal Vagal Shutdown is exactly what is happening to me when my phone starts ringing off the hook about my dad overdosing again or when have to get back to my lawyer because I’m trying to keep my kids safe from my abusive ex-husband and I’m overwhelmed and scared. It happened when I was a little girl who couldn’t get away from the adults who were screaming, fighting, and shooting guns into the air. And it happens to me now when my own little kiddo has been sobbing and raging for 45 minutes because all of the big emotions of missing her Dad but being afraid of him too are too much for her little body and heart. Vagal Dorsal Shutdown has, unfortunately, been my go-to survival method for years and I just thought something was wrong with me. Whew! And this is just ONE “a-ha” moment from this book. I’m telling you. You have to read it.
So what about the downside? Nothing is perfect. Are there any problems with this book? I would say that the biggest downside of this book is also one of its strengths. There is a LOT of information provided to the reader. The book is wordy. It’s a heavy topic and the book itself is pretty long. I had picked up the book and read just a handful of pages before I realized that I was going to have to take notes and really commit in order to digest the information in this book. Well, sixty pages of notes and a “read and think about at least one section a day” rule for myself and I finally made it to the end – but it took a while. Keep this in mind as you’re preparing to read it. And, if you need to move along by getting a general idea but not the nitty-gritty details of a brain scan or something (like I did a couple of times), that is totally fine. Progress not perfection, am I right?
As an ACoA, you basically grew up stuck in a little dysfunctional petri dish that was the perfect environment for trauma to flourish. Your body and brain developed in certain ways because of that situation. I’m sorry it happened to you too. And it wasn’t ever your fault. But now? Now you have a choice about how you’d like to handle the aftermath. You and your body are so capable and intelligent! Your brain can change. Your body can learn new ways of being. And that’s 100% true no matter what age you are! So here’s my two cents: If you’ve tried talk therapy but it hasn’t helped, read this book. If you feel like there is a piece missing in your healing work and you can’t figure out what it is, read this book. If there is a little pull inside of your body as you read this review, read this book. The treasure of knowledge inside the pages is incredible and I want you to share the benefits too!